Aundrea O’Neill
One of our greatest blessings is communication. Whether we communicate through speech, through art, or through music, the ability to share ideas and information, and the desire to do so, is one of those things that unites us as people, wherever we are on the globe.
My name is Aundrea, and I am a psychologist and language coach in the U.K. I teach in countries all over the world. My role is to identify the communication skills inherent within those I work with, to help them to nurture and blossom those skills, to their highest level, whether it is improving their pronunciation, clarity, vocabulary, timing, public speaking, or confidence building or a myriad of different things. So, in this role I am very blessed, in that I can share people’s journeys, as they learn, both to recognise, to develop and to maximize their communication skills.
Communication is a skill, but is also an art form and a gift! Every one of us will be gifted in some way in this field. We may not see it at first glance, or, we may even take those gifts for granted, but they are there, nonetheless. It could even be a mother’s gentle words to reassure her child, or a counsellors well-chosen words to help someone in a difficult time in their life. Whether it is a Priest, whose homily inspires his congregation, sending them out into the world invigorated and filled with love and joy of Jesus, all of these, and many others, are examples of the gifts we take for granted every day.
Communication is not just about speech. Psychologists agree, that between 70% and 80% of all communication, is what we term NVC, non-verbal communication. This is not as high and grand a concept as it seems. It is in fact quite simple. When we meet someone, we smile. This smile is NVC. It has already communicated a lot about us, before we say a single word. It has told the person we are happy, friendly, pleased, to see them. We take it for granted, but even the wonderful, universal gesture of a smile, is a communication tool, that says so much. The same is true whenever an artist hangs a piece of art for others to see. S/he is communicating feelings, that invite others to discuss the picture and the feelings and emotions it invokes within them. It is the same when a musician plays a piece that we feel in our hearts, then sing along for the rest of the day. The smile, the picture, the song, are all forms of communication. They all touch hearts and bring people together. They break down barriers, they allow us to be ourselves and to welcome and accept others to just be themselves too.
The nonverbal communications allow us to communicate where language might be a barrier. To see the world as a group of people, looking eagerly to communicate, to understand and to share our common goals, of finding happiness, peace and joy, in our shared world.
So how can we unveil these incredible gifts that are within each and every one of us? I would suggest the first step is to recognise their existence, within ourselves and others. That through our words, or our music, or our art, we can show a little of ourselves and our feelings and beliefs to others. We can bring them on a journey of discovery with us. We can describe and create new depths to an idea. Our words can sooth, heal, inspire, educate, and inform. Our words can change lives, and change directions. A conversation with a child can change his or her ambitions for their life. The right words can build good relationships, and a few, well chosen words, can help lift someone from feelings of melancholy or loneliness. However, the converse is also true. Our words can cause pain as well as heal. So, the second lesson I would suggest, is to recognise, that like any other tool, they can be utilised for positive or negative purposes. Words, even unintentionally, can be wounding. So, we must, having recognised the gift of communication, determine to use it for good. To use it to improve the world, to improve people’s lives and to spread the word of God.
The third step is to accept that they are gifts, ready for us to share. No one is given a gift and keeps it wrapped in the paper it comes in. They open the gift, rejoice in it, and share it. It is the same with communication. Feel confident in yourself, this might seem a flippant phrase. Feeling confident isn’t that easy after all, not for everyone, and certainly not all the time. But once we recognise that God has given us these gifts, for us to use, and to share with each other, it is hard not to rejoice in them.
The final thought is that listening is much a communication skill as all the other communication mechanisms. Being attentive to what people are truly saying to us. Each person’s life story is important, each person’s personal experiences and wisdom are gifts to share. So, what can we take from this? Firstly, that everyone is blessed, and we are all blessed in different ways. That each gift is as valuable as the other. If someone’s gift is the ability to soothe a crying child through their vocal calming, if someone else’s gift is poetry, and someone else’s is verbal storytelling, if someone else is musically gifted, then they are all gifted equally, because the joy of communication is expression and connectivity. Secondly, communication is like a jigsaw puzzle we all bring our own pieces to the table and together we create an interconnectivity that binds us together as local communities, as well as a global community and that connectivity benefits us all. Remember, YOU and your gift, can change the world, you can change it in one word or song or painting at a time. You can make it an amazing place, and you can do it, starting today.
Leave a comment